While channel surfing I caught former Vice President Al (B)ore on Oprah winfrey where he was touting "Five ways to fight global warming."

The suggestions:

1) Use fluorescent bulbs
2) Use solar-energized outdoor lighting
3) Use computer-activated "smart" heating/cooling thermostats
4) Use a blanket on your water heater
5) Regularly change out the filter on your heating/cooling system.

While three of the suggestions are valid, AlGore hasn't thought about the unintended consequences of the first two suggestions.

Fluorescent bulbs and the solar-energized outdoor LED lighting contain dangerous levels of mercury. When disposed of incorrectly pose a threat to human beings and muck up landfills with these trace elements. Not only that, like tube-based fluorescent lights, the bulbs emit radio frequency which interfere with hearing aids. This goes to prove that there is no "free lunch," and that this really poses another good argument that we as human beings should stop using fossil-based energy resources in our daily lives, and that we should resort to returning to caves and mudhuts and campfires.... But don't campfires emit smoke which goes up into the atmosphere causing more pollution?

Which leads me to suggest the only way out of this whole cunundrum: we need to regress to pre-fire discovering cavemen living, and regress back to the evolution of humans so that we are carbon-emitting negative specie.

Sounds logical to me..... (Tongue firmly in cheek)